Revisiting the Cult of Heather & Cornelius Lindsey

The Lindseys, Pinky Promise, & The Gathering Oasis

Since the murmurings began, I’ve dreaded the reality that I’d be asked to address this situation again. Yet, here we are.

In the last few weeks, Ayanna Mathis (@AyannaZMathis) has led the public call out against Cornelius & Heather Lindsey in an open letter detailing the allegations against them. These allegations include sexual misconduct, verbal and mental abuse of employees, and recorded audio of a conspiracy to defraud the IRS in 2016. Many have stepped forward to confirm these allegations with testimony of their experiences, including Cornelius Lindsey’s former assistant, Ta’Sean McKinley.

I published The Cult of Heather Lindsey in September 2016, my highest viewed post since the digital inception of Unfit Christian at over 150,000 views. It is arguably the most controversial piece I’ve published and has garnered mixed reactions for years. For as many people as it freed from the clutches of a spiritual pyramid scheme, there are many who felt hurt, angered, and deeply offended. It is those who fall in the latter group for whom my heart mourns in this moment.

To be clear: I believe these accusations by the victims. Not because I have a personal issue with The Lindseys or because I choose to always suspend my disbelief for victims. I believe these things to be true because these abuses align to the very things I spoke about almost FIVE YEARS prior to this happening. I questioned the legal structure of Pinky Promise. I asserted that Heather Lindsey’s message of material gain as an outward appearance of God’s favor was problematic. I questioned their theological framework, education, and earnest call. I challenged Pinky Promise as a profitable pipe dream that ran on the fuel of women’s desperation to be chosen and partnered. I warned that the “Lindsey allure” teetered on the line of idolatry and deification — hell, I did call it a cult in the title after all.

While my theological location causes many to question my beliefs as heresy, I know the prophetic voice within me, period. Yet, I do not delight in this moment of exposure. I knew then what I know now: there is much amiss in the ministry, brand, and business that is the Lindsey empire. I cannot delight in my accuracy because at the apex of all of this is thousands of souls who are undoubtedly in a crisis of faith and belief given the uncertainty surrounding their spiritual leaders.

To quote Ayanna Mathis, “victims often take years to realize the abuse is happening due to gaslighting, manipulative practices, impression management, etc., before they escape.” I cannot help but wonder if those who in 2016 angrily emailed, commented, tweeted, and clocked me in private conversation are now among the voices of the victims in this. The tweets, private messages, and emails I’m receiving now indicate that my piece planted a seed in the minds of many that has taken deep roots in the wake of this scandal. Yet, as a responsible leader, my mind is focused on the thousands who are experiencing the disappointment, confusion, and profound disruption that defines the experience of church hurt.

When Church Hurts

Too often, we engage in kitschy deflection tactics when we discuss the church’s abuse, misuse, and harm against both its parishioners and the world around it. We clamor to say that church doesn’t hurt people hurt people hurt people or that being hurt in other spaces such as the workplace doesn’t deter us from continued fellowship in those spaces. These gaslighting statements work to absolve our personal responsibility as a body to not do harm. Without the people, there is no church. WE ARE THE CHURCH. You and I as the church have been eagerly complicit in the emotional and spiritual manipulation of others in Jesus’ name. The current truths stepping forward against the Lindseys only exemplify this ongoing abuse that has been normalized in our many sanctuaries.

When the dust settles from this, what becomes of the brokenhearted left in the wake of fallen leaders? Who is there to help heal them? What do we say or do in work of reconciliation and justice for those whose whole understanding of God, faith, and belief are now shattered because they were attached to their leaders? Sure, it is easy to say that they should’ve known better, but victim blaming solves nothing.

We cannot afford to underestimate the impact of church hurt or Religious Trauma Syndrome (RTS). Religious Trauma Syndrome (RTS) is a function of both the chronic abuses of harmful religion and the impact of severing one’s connection with one’s faith and faith community. It can be compared to a combination of PTSD and Complex PTSD (C-PTSD). The immense harm of irresponsible leadership cannot be understated.

The depth of intimacy we form with our church community, particular with our pastors, is as meaningful as those we form with our spouses or children. We trust them with care of both our spirits and our hearts. We trust that they are honest, sincerely loving, and that they have our best interests at heart. So when that trust is betrayed, it hurts in a way that is not easily articulated in words. It is a harm that has reverberating repercussions beyond its immediate victims.

Despite my starkly contrasting theological framework with many of the victims involved, I unequivocally support this call-in to justice, reconciliation, and accountability for Heather and Cornelius Lindsey. It’s time we take ownership of the continued harm we cause for people who entrusted us with their spiritual well-being. Abuse is happening in our sanctuaries and more of us are ready to jump and defend a building more than we are ready to heal those to whom we are bonded to through Christ. It’s time to dead that mindset and the time is right now.

You are owed more than your pastor turning your counseling session into his Sunday sermon.

You are owed more than being managed, silenced, and maligned when you bid the courage to confront spiritual leaders who do you harm.

You are owed more than opaque financial accounting for ministries to which you’ve sown your time, talent, and tenth.

You are owed more than to be told to give your time, money, and emotional investment only to be condemned to hell by ignorant church leaders and people whose own failure to reconcile their sexuality and spirituality caused them to demonize yours.

Church Hurt takes MANY forms. You are owed more than being shamed and blamed as the VICTIM OF ABUSE.

If you’re reading this and have been hurt by the church, I SEE YOU. Your pain is real and I will not silence or overlook it for my personal convenience.

May peace and comfort come for the victims. May the conviction of accountability and swift retribution be upon the leaders and all who enable them.

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